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Outfitting: Disrupting the Dogma of a Mother’s Purpose & Identity

I began writing this book as the linchpin in the next chapter of my career. Then, as John Lennon says in the famous song about his son, “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.”

Check.

In the middle of crafting my shifts from salesmom to stay-at-home to the convergence of both, I first heard the dreaded “C-word.”

Not that one. Jeez. No, Cancer. Seeerious diagnosis. Stage 3 pancreatic. Yikes. All bets were off.

Then after I conquered that shit, and knew my family and I could start buying green bananas again, I relaunched my writing campaign.

But suddenly small irks in my marriage morphed into major mayhem. Not just cracks in the façade, but all structural integrity at risk. Another imminent collapse. Are you kidding me?

I realized – not without personal agony and daylong crying jags – that I could turn my struggles around. I was the mistress of my dominion. And not only that, I could help support and guide other women in the workforce, other moms, other people in general (maybe you!). How? A positive-minded, but warts-and-all, recommendation for negotiating these inevitable transitions from chapter to chapter. It might not feel like it, but I guarantee you that you can rock this stuff – even the really, really crappy stuff – with good planning, optimism, and the appropriate amount of snark.

Mostly, you can do so on your own terms, on your own schedule, based on your values and not someone else’s. Especially not the rules and prescriptions/proscriptions of a now-defunct past many people cling to tenaciously for no good reason anymore. What is a woman? What is a mother? What is a working mom? You get to define that stuff for yourself.

You don’t have to fit in to any idea that it is not your own, not consistent with your values, mission, and circumstances. Girl, you gotta fit out to be your true you, your authentic self.

Let’s start by lending each other a hand, instead of backhanding each other. Let’s start with embracing our imperfections rather than striving to be perfect (and posting the “evidence” of our lovely lives all over social media). Let’s begin by allowing ourselves the freedom of choice we so often say we can get behind, but on which we so often find ourselves behind the eight ball.

So sign up to my email list to read the first chapter of my book, Outfitting: Disrupting the Dogma of a Mother’s Purpose & Identity. Lend me your trust for a little bit and start trusting yourself and your instincts. I promise you won’t lose by it.

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